Groooss

So since I have no plan right now, I have pretty much been winging it. Today, I consumed 450 calories, and I feel DISGUSTING. It just seems like so much to me, and I'm not really sure what to do. I suppose I should just wait and see if I lost weight tomorrow morning before I make myself feel miserable for my fatness. I don't know if it is the fact that my stomach has shrunk and am not starving or if it is the fact that I have energy and am not about to black out every time I move, but I feel as though I am not restricting enough. I really, really wanted chocolate again today, but fortunately, I learned my lesson. If I'm craving something, then I shouldn't go to the grocery store even for gum because the temptation will be too much. I decided to just deal with it and had an apple instead. I don't know why I'm getting all of these cravings, but I did have less-than-one-tampon's-worth of a period a few days ago...could that be related? I don't normally have a menstrual cycle, even though I'm twenty, and I've heard that girls crave things then. It's kind of sad that I don't know about these things...

Anyway, I am also searching for a good workout that won't strain my knee. I have knee problems, which cuts down on pretty much any exercise that I could possibly do besides swimming. And while I love to swim (and used to be a hard core swimmer before college), it's just too cold outside to walk around with a wet head. Once the weather warms up about ten degrees, I will be more than happy to swim laps. I think swimming would be especially good because there wouldn't be any dizzy spells or anything. And I might try some yoga, depending on the pose...maybe I just need to work out to pump up with weight loss to make myself feel better.

Is it ridiculous that I feel so fat when I've still been eating less than 500 calories?