Uh Oh

I'm having the worst chocolate cravings of all time right now. I've had about 150 calories, and I want chocolate sooo badly. I've tried everything to curb this feeling, and it's been hours since it started. I did an awesome job this morning when I went to brunch and resisted everything but black coffee. Maybe the prospect of pancakes really got to me. Perhaps if I just went to the grocery store and got some diet root beer, I would be fine. Unfortunately, there is also almond milk and sugar free pudding mix...which is coincidentally what I really really want. It would put me at 300 calories instead of 200, but I would be so happy. I'm really considering breaking the diet for it, so I think you can guess how strong this craving is. I haven't had chocolate of any form in weeks.

I'm not going to binge or start eating everything in sight, but it worries me that if I don't just succumb and eat the diet pudding that a binge could be exactly what happens. Sometimes just giving yourself what you truly desire is the best way. I haven't done it yet, but I hope I'm not a serious let down to people if I go 100 calories over. I'll eat 100 calories less tomorrow, which I tend to do every day anyway. I know it wouldn't be exactly within the plan, but let's face it, who really cares how strict I am with the diet? I care about losing weight and eating very little, and I have been losing a pound a day. I don't think 300 calories today would suddenly turn me into a balloon...okay, I'm ranting. This urge feels like something bigger than me. And I think the sooner I get the correct ingredients, the less likely I'll buy a pint of Ben & Jerry's, which would obviously be worse than 150 calories of pudding. I know this from experience.

Yep, definitely doing it. But hey, 300 calories total for the day is still pretty good, and I did resist both pancakes and cinnamon rolls this morning so I still am feeling successful regardless. Maybe, even though it's cheating, I can take the extra calories from that 500 day and just tack it on today haha

Sorry for the let down, people. It's not really a binge, though, at least.