Spring Break

Okay, so here's the deal. I leave on spring break in exactly 15 days, so I'm pretty much going to be counting down every day. I'm going to Arizona with my roommate to visit my grandparents in a retirement community just outside of Phoenix. And during that week that we will be basking in the desert, we're also going to take a weekend trip to see my Aunt and Uncle in L.A. I'm really excited for this, but I desperately need to lose weight...about 10 pounds. I told my roommate that we're going to eat healthily and work out a lot in order to lose, ahem, five pounds before we leave. Of course, what I really meant was that I'm going to not really eat, work out a lot, and lose at least 10 pounds before we leave. I couldn't say that aloud, for obvious reasons. Sometimes I forget that most people would not think it possible to lose that much weight in such a short amount of time, but I see it as a completely reasonable goal. Those same people would say something along the lines of, "Well, you could lose that much, but you'd probably have to starve." Well, duh! I will never understand people who don't know how to lose weight. It's really simple. Don't eat.

So, I will feverishly track my progress and see how things go. I've already had some frozen grapes, some broccoli, and am currently eating cauliflower. It feels like a lot of food, but at least it's still less than 300 calories. I worked out earlier, but I'm going again since I will be tanning tonight and the gym is in the same building. I figure I might as well make use of my time, and it's not like I'm doing anything else productive. Also, I took one of my diet pills earlier, and I'm probably going to take the other one really soon. Hopefully it won't ruin my attempt to sleep tonight since I'm going to bed in just a few hours...early class.

By the way, I just downloaded the soundtrack from Fame, and I highly suggest it. I really love the songs, and it reminds me of all those skinny bitches from the movie. I'm sooo jealous of how skinny dancers are. My roommate kept saying how she wished she were a dancer except that "they're probably all anorexic." Ugh. I hate it when people make comments like that about things they don't understand. Anorexia and other eating disorders are not jokes! Geez...I mean, I'm not anorexic because 1) I'm not a stick and 2) I can't fast for more than 4 days. Plus, I don't think I really have a problem; I'm just a good dieter. Or maybe I'm just trying to convince myself that I don't have an eating disorder of some sort. But regardless, my roommate made several comments like that throughout the day (this was Sunday), and it was really frustrating. I would just awkwardly laugh and agree. She's said before how she could never be anorexic because she likes food too much and doesn't understand how some girls could just not eat. Yeah, I thought that way once too...back when I was a freshman in high school. So, seven years ago maybe? Things sure can change quickly. I feel like I just woke up one morning and finally had the will power to just not eat. That little voice in the back of my head that screamed every time I picked up a piece of food finally won, and I just couldn't motivate myself to eat anything or to eat much. And the voice is growing stronger again. I'm pretty sure I won't be eating tomorrow. Sometimes I just have no desire, and I never want to until dinner time anyway. Lately, I have the hardest time deciding to eat anything because I wake up every morning thinking I'm going to fast. It works well until about 6 p.m., at which I have some fruit, pickles, or steamed veggies. Or apparently, fruit and vegetables. I'm disgusting.

Okay, I'm going to go burn off all these gross vegetables that I've stuffed myself with.